Human and people

oh ahoy! its been awhile now since...umm, awhile? hehe. so i want to..ehh, express something this time. it's about a lecturer of mine and his lectures. you know, he is a very exprience man and a good lecturer, there's no doubt about that but he's kinda confused me. i dunno if the other students were confused too but if you look a point of view, he's biased with things he said and his facts, they were kind of exaggerate. also, he told us that we can confide anything to him, problems and stuff, that i doubt very much, not because he couldnt keep a secret or such, i think he's pretty judging tho he told us he just going to be honest..well, for me, it's always been a good relationship with the lectures but when it comes to psychological, that's no child's play. i dunno why, but i have this feeling that he doesnt like me, yep. i swear i didnt literally and never done anything wrong to him, intentionally or unintentionally, so why? i always felt that he always try to provoke me and tell me indirectly that i have no personality. wth? maybe i am a bit of an introvert and i dun speak much in his class, i dun 'sparkle' him with knowledge that i have, i dun show off like the rest of them, because i am being me. that's me and the other lecturer are fine by it, why he has to do that to me? i dont see a reason why i have to go his way if i am not comfortable with myself rite? if he is an honest man, marks on the subject is untouchable and not going to be effected by his judgement. i often sit at my place and look directly to him in class and think about a lot of stuff about things that he said. and i come to a conclusion: i don't like him. that's it, he annoyed me and i don't want to give a shit about what he wants to say about me anyway. i know who i am and he is who he is, i am not going to be him and he's not going to get the best of me. well, i just hope i'll survive this sem and not going to see him again at the rest of the sems left. don't think i can't take that much anymore.

next, on last wednesday, i had an appointment, what is it, you don't need to know. so as usual, i went to that place and i'll have an attendant to attend me. it's always Becky who attended me, but this time, it was Wei Wei. how different can the two people who work at the same place, supposedly doing the same thing everyday? very, very different and if i have to rate, i'll give them equally. i like both, how well they do their work and both has their ways to do things. so, why do we want to do things in other's way when we can do it our way? why do we have to be like the others while we have our own identity and who are they to tell you that you don't have a personality? so ok, i might sucks at giving first impression but you can't keep keeping me in your black list and telling what should i do this and that? so, everyone is different, accept it. and i'll try to fix me to be better, for myself, but not you. that, you have to accept, mr. you can tell on me anything but i'll never let you get the real me.