Twilight,tWilight,twIlight,twiLight,twilIght,twiliGht,twiligHt,twilighT,TWILIGHT!

It's huge. One of the most highly anticipated films of the year. I was so crazy, so obsessed, so into it but where is it? Ahh, I've done my part long time ago, before the movie. Based from the book itself. Find it, read it. It might not be as interesting as yours but you have my say. Wasn't that enough? :]

27th, 28th and 29th of November 2008 in Cameron Highland

Family vacation of the year. Hahaha, funny. Really, well its a private joke anyway. Here some pics to share:

missing: kaklang a.k.a the picture taker. click2.

kaklong and kakak aisyah while ziyad with kaklong. Haha.

the biggest pumpkin, the one the i've seen anyway and me screwing up ziyad on bed! walla!

*fresh strawberries with a lot of whippy cream and vanilla ice-cream[my personal fav
!]

* kinda candid, tapi x jadi kot.

foursome, hehe and poison ivy?! i love this plant!

3 plus 3 equals to half a dozen. hmm, means everyone is here!

*screwing up ziyad again, we have such a good time. cold and cold. dont you wish it was you?

* we screwing up the strawberries as if it wasnt enough for everyone and as if they love them. sigh.

uh oh. dead bored. in the car.

i love to bite ears. nibble. hehe.

well, that's all. just something to share. hope no one got hurt. *wink wink*:]

Our Little Story

When the pure whites are playing among the lonely blue
If a perfect combination is between the sight of me and you
In a wide open space I found a lonely you lingered around
As your invincible silent serenade moving in without a sound

I am the blue one up there in this clear invisible atmosphere
Where the cloud stays and where the rain would drop a tear
I am the sky of the earth of your world as you say I would be
I will be the bluest sky that was meant only for you to see

There you are in a perfect shape of a cloud that so white
My bed of cotton candy of the morning in the bright light
Once I let you go away so far but you have never gone
Keep coming around like you used to as I am still going on

You revolved around me so constantly so near and so close
I have never understand before why am I the one you have chose
It is my existence that completes you and you to complete mine
Finally our thousands of thin lines of love are securely bind

To the little white cloud as the whitest cloud I saw up in the sky
For my blue will be ever blue when you are with me and never die
As my faithful companion and a friend who kept the half of me
A story of the bluest sky and the whitest cloud for you and me


Yasmin
13 Oct 08 1937 hours

I've done it. You know who you are. :]

Books, endless questions and glasses Part III

Describe yourself as an object.

Hidayah: ‘Im a glass.. There r many type of glass n i can mould into any 2 satisfy a viewer. But im vulnerable n also fragile. Ppl mostly see thru me not into me. They love me at first then gets bored wit my beauty..’

Yasmin: ‘Im a glass, can be half full or half empty. Usually full. Thts me wen im eccentric. Like u, i can be seen tru bt not c completely whole of me. My structure fixed. I dun feel the need 2 pls others. They just have 2 accept me the way i am. Tall, hard, bt vulnerable n fragile.


You should have picked up 4 things

1. We are so the best of friends. It shows.
2. We are most alike in a lot of different ways.
3. We are the glass. Be careful.
4. We totally fucked up the English in smsing, just like you. :]

Books, endless questions and glasses Part II

We’ve been playing 99 questions a few moments ago. It was so much fun! Ha-ha. I mean, so what’s the big deal for you huh? Hah, you wouldn’t know, baby. Sorry! We had so much fun, did we Hidayah? The truth, the obscene, the dreams and so on. Now I know and you too. But we seem to run out of questions and times. I miss those moments. Sigh. Well, it was great compare to nothing. I guess we could have it again with the list of questions in our hands and fill in the blanks together. Heh. :]

Books, endless questions and glasses Part I

‘We got close by Twilight, falling apart by New Moon through Eclipse and Breaking Dawn brought us back together.’

You might have been wondering what this is about. Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse and Breaking Dawn. These are actually a book series that was written by an arising author, Stephanie Meyer. These are also my favourite books of all time. But I am not going to talk about those books but this is a story of a beautiful friendship that starts and ends and starts over again by those books. Thank you, Steph!

Twilight. The first book of the series. It should be just like any other typical books or novels but for me, it was a little bit more than that. It was not just about the good story that the book carries but it was also because of this one particular book, it brought two friends together who share things in common. I love books and so does she. It is like having a book club and I can talk whatever about the book with her because we both know the book by our hearts. In fact, I can talk to her almost about everything and I am really enjoyed having conversations with her. It was almost the same as when you making a joke and people would laugh at your joke. Something like that.

Then the New Moon was published. It was because of this book that has taken the big toll on the friendship that was newly built and ruined everything. Well, it was not entirely the book’s fault, it was me who cannot control my own feelings. It goes out like this, the day before the disaster happened, I was so pissed off for not be able to buy that book. It was already in my arms and ready to be paid but someone took that happiness away from me. I cried a thousand tears when I reached home and carried the same pissed off feelings at school on the next day. I was literally emotionally disturb and became very aggressive that day. I did not talk to anyone because I was so angry and sad. She noticed that I did not talk to her on that day and probably she feels abandoned. In this part of the destruction, it is rather complicated because it's involving the matter of hearts and feelings. It is hard to be described, to be put on the paper and to make a story. But in the end, the destruction accomplished. She and I are not friends anymore and you could say it was kinda worst, sworn enemies? Maybe.

Eclipse. Done nothing in particular. So, lets leave it to that.

Ahhh, our most favorite book of all. The last book, Breaking Dawn. The finale of the story, where Bella finally found her true happiness and who could have thought, after all her near-to-death experiences, she finally got what she always wanted. And with the happy ending of the book, we both worked out our misunderstanding and end up with a happy ending as well. Who could have thought, no? I’ve found her through the crowd and lost her in the oddest way that I couldn’t ever imagine of losing a friend and I got her back in a way of similar. Life does works in the strangest ways. It never occurred to me that I would ever talk to her again. All I could think of was my ravage nonsense anger towards her like she has taken something away from me. Of course, when you think about someone, whether they are good or bad, it’s a mix of thinking what it could have been if….. Well, what done is done and none can’t undo it. I have to say that I’m glad. That does sounds dysfunctional but really, books, either their physical matter or the contents, does help people see through their lives and literally show them what they are missing. I did. We both did and now, we are having the most beautiful moments of life together as a friend. A best of friends of the blue sky and the white cloud. A perfect combination. :]

HOLIDAYS

Yes, holidays again!!! Haha. For all the techears-to-be, happy holiday! Its good to be finally home. Ok, so IPIK wasn't that far but still, I was not at home. Oh, so many things has happened to me. Good things that is. Something that I have never thought I would do. Something new and still the same old, same old me. Heh. Finals sucks. Big time. I mean, I don't know who sucks more, me or the paper. Ok, I did answered all. So, it must be the paper then. LOL. Hmm, what else? Nothing interesting happened. My life as a college student now is practically boring and I don't know why. Aren't we supposed to enjoy our youth through college's life? Sigh. Seriously, it was dead bored and I died out of the boredom! There in my college, I just couldn't find anybody, like in that thousands of numbers of educated people, none of them could be related to me in any way. Ugh. I couldn't even find anyone who share the same passion of my obsessive love for books. Ok, figure of speech. But the point is, it makes me brain dead when you couldn't talk about things you know or like and when you do, they just didn't get you. Take example of my classmates, girls. All they ever talked about is boys, getting phone numbers from someone, going out and yada, yada, yada! I don't do that. Ok, I get that. See through your eyes, I was such a boring person but hey, good books, good music and all of other things besides those petty stuff are way worth debating. Sigh. It was just hard for me. Well, what to do then? I have another 5 wasted years there and there is nothing I could do but to live in isolation. Ok, that is dramatic. 5 wasted years but to live my life to the fullest. I will not let small things like that kill me so easily. Still, I wish somebody was there to get me through. Flesh and blood. This goes to hidayah. I know you will there for me, babe...but you are still just, on the phone. I wish you too, could be with me, flesh and blood. Well, I think, enough for today. Hah. I am crazy anyway. :]

It's been awhile.

It's been awhile since my last post. Been lazying these days. Yeah, like you people care to read my blog. Heh. Well, I've managed to write 2 essays in that periods of time. One is complete and another one is still in progress. Lazying, remebered? Both are about someone and I'm pretty sure she did not have the patience to wait but have to anyway. Haha. Just Something that I've thought of and have to write it down? Nonetheless, still, I have fun doing it. Maybe I'll post it in my next post or whatever. :]

The LAST book of the series. Yeah, I own it! Breaking Dawn.

Finally, the time has come. I got the book! Yes, thanks to Hidayah and my new acquaintance, Firdaus....cute....hahahahaha. All the way from Kajang to my 'dearest' IPIK. I'm sooooo happy to see her again. Such a long time. Well, I better get back to the book. It's definitely irresistable! Yummy! :]

Why oh why

Well, two weeks of.....i dont know, tortured days are finally over! Wow, you wouldnt believe it how hard the life on the other side of the grass are. And I do. And it will continue until the day you die. Luckily, I've met a few, actually more than a few people that I thought I would never come across in my so insignificant life. It was amazing how different and how odd things can turned out to be. Its just happened. To me too. It changed the way I see things and the way I my mind works through out the process since I've been there. Somehow, it makes ready to face anything and nothing will ever bring me down. I'm whole new person now with the same originality of me inside. For that, if you jugde me for how I looks from the outside rather than try to go deep down into my pink little heart, I'll just smile to your shallowness.

Having new things doesnt mean you need to throw away the yesterday. Because the yesterday always reminding on how you used to be before. Its classic as they say, and classics never die. So, cherish both as you go along the way. You never know when you might need one of both.

This experiences has given me so much more in this life and it will never stop until I closed my eyes. :]

Orientasi - orientasi IPIK

1. My personal hell on earth.
2. Hot and pretty senior. Haha. Enjoying the view, eh?
3. During the orientation, I cursed all the time silently in my head:P
4. Gain useful knowledge.
5. I really, REALLY hate aerobic when I was force to do it.
6. Met new interesting people along the way.
7. 24 hours there are just not enough!
8. Finally, feel like somewhere I belong.
9. I've been pushed mentally and emotionally too far! ARGGH!!!
10. I guessed everything that happened, happens for a reason. I was mad, sad and totally pissed off. But in the end, it was nothing compared to what I gained in the process. Thank you. To all of you. :]

Either way.....its still hard.

I'm off to college now. Well, starting this 14th. For a second, I just can't believe it. I mean, I still eye candy on the school boys pretending I am too a school student which is kinda sick if you ask me. Haha. After this, no more uniform (maybe on the first week), no more spoon-fed, no more time to sleep and sleep and sleep, just me. A few new friends, maybe and life on assignments!! This is the part when your whole life changed. I was always a homie girl and now going away for a really long time. Although it wasn't that far, just a distance between me and my family, my home and my playful kittens, I'm going to be in home sick mode for always. Forever. Nonetheless, I'm still looking forward for this whole new journey. I'm going to make it as far as I could and thinking of it as a redemption of what I didn't get last time. No more failure. No more. I'm going to strive for the very best and make all my dreams come true. I'm going to be one of those living proof that dreams do come true. Inshallah. :]

I.....yayy!!

I did get in!!
I really do put thoughts on it.
I want to go there.
I will be what I want to be .
I need that.
I want that.
I got that. :]

Loser

*Ok, here's the dealio, I am single with 'a-never-had-a-bf-before' status. Does that makes me a loser? Hmmm, maybe, maybe not. I'm happy with myself. I'm still a loser? Heh.*

It got me thinking again. BOYS. What would it be, well, how would I be if I have a boyfriend? What would my boyfriend be? Will my parents approve? I did wonder though, what sort of a guy that my father would ever get along with? I mean, not that I care but he's going to be the witnesses of my marriage. He has that power above all. Will they ever get along? I might as well be marrying a freak. Haha.

I have this unusual thoughts of my boyfriend or a husband. Not so soon, eh? What I want is someone that exquisite, not just on face, although that will definitely be a plus but more to the man himself. He doesn't have to play sport or be the man of the man, if he just be the real him, it will be good enough for me. Some say guys like it straight forward but I think a little game of thoughts wouldn't hurt. I like guys who like to play along. What could be heavenly than that? Maybe a little danger too wouldn't cut short your life off. Just don't get yourself killed.

I really won't go for the typical male whose showing material things and have a killer fashion sense. Dress to kill or die? Do you really have to wear those ridiculous large glasses like you're going to pose with it on the a red carpet? Please.....but that doesn't mean I would go for someone who is a fashion victim either. Trend or not trend, for real?

I was thinking, a simple pair of wash out jeans, a sleeve shirt under a hoodie. Pair of sneakers or canvas shoes and sweet attitude. Works for me. Such a nice view. Or a nice suits. Simple and breath-taking. But no. Sadly, men these days, dress more than us girls. I do feel ashamed sometimes. Well, now,now, don't we just got it carried away? Hmmm, don't get offended, its only just one girl opinion. if you agree, high 5! :]

A day with myself at KLCC

Never thought I would do it. Alone. With books!!! Wheeee! Well, I've stayed there for more than 2 hours browsing, looking, finding, searching and peeking! Well, those guys are so obviously good looking. But books are so much better. Its funny, each time I went to KLCC, either with friends or family or alone with myself, even if I'm not intending to buy anything, I would definitely walk right into the Kinokuniya and touching those books! It's like I'm lusting for them! Mwahahahaha. Crazy but I love to be surrounding by books. It's a little paradise of mine on earth. So, I bought just one book (how sad?) wishing I could have (not buy, hey I'm wishing!) half of the lonely books there in the Kinokuniya. There are so many books that I want to read but I have to give it up thinking about buying them next time because I have to cut short my money to buy my dad an EXPENSIVE birthday card. I mean I really have to get my dad that particular birthday card and it cost me a fortune. *sigh*. Well, mission completed. I've found them. No need to buy again. Maybe for trousers. Lots of them. :]

Happy Birthday, Kakak Aisyah!!!

Whew, what a party! Maybe not. It's just a birthday with the family. I love birthdays! Other people another one year old days that is. Not mine though. Surprise party is a big no-no. I just couldn't handle the.....cake, people and my clumsiness. Really, NO! Well, back to the main story, we had a cake, kakak wants it pink but dad couldn't find one at the secret recipe? What were you thinking dad? So, he bought her a strawberry cake still thinking it would be the same. Guess what? The cake still in the fridge and it wasn't kid's top choice of an ideal birthday cake. Heh. A cake layered with actual creamy smashy strawberries. Well, kakak wants a Barbie on her cake too, so dad bought porcelain figure dolls and butterflies on metal sticks for decoration. Wasn't that bad if I must say. Her birthday present are two pink shirts, one of them was customized by me with fabric ink gel saying "Aisyah 4th Birthday". I love it, she loves it. Then playing with the cake, smeared in chocolates and the end. :]

I

I didn't get in.
I really thought that I actually had a chance.
I don't want to go there.
I just want to be what I want to be.
I need that.
I want that.
I still didn't get in. :[

Something that nobody would buy. I would.

Nor Afiqah Ibrahim

PRO :Breakfast with my part time hubby and my forever lesbo

Non - Stop talkingReleasing tension

Our first hang out since ages!Tissue bread and milo ice! haha Roti Tisu la ngok! aku mencapap je english

Wear my new shirt shirt! muahaha

Im late but I like it =P They waited me at the post guard for about 23 minutes and 56 second

Comment about Azim's driving skills

New heels! and Loving it

Gay is cute!Gossiping! Gossiping! Gossping! Haaaa... A gift from Yasmin.Thanks for the nicest shirt! but It makes me doom =P Reminds me of Joey la ngek ngok haha

Overall, best! The next meet is needed before we enter college.

CON:SHIT. The bread is lack of sugar. Take note la brader. I told u.ADD MORE SUGAR!The blur blur waiters.I have to pay for the bills cos Im lateI dont have enough money to buy that scarf.Oh chit chit!Mummy called and ......... Are u taking ur breakfast or lunch? Come back nooowwwwwww!I dont buy any thong! muahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaha stupid

I dont buy the car mag! ughh shit

Our next meet, the one who is late 5 mins will pay the bill.The heels is high but doesnt change a thing anyway.Im still short among us!

Ok.. Ok.. I posted this cos Im APPRECIATE our moments! haha

Do not complain anymore ok.Ill keep in touch with u u u everyday ok?

LOADS OF LOVE<3 hunnie=")

Muhammad Azim Syafiq Abdul Majid

tis is ur part time hubby fic...yasmin kte still bestie..lets keep it jus bestie...fic lambat kena denda byr makan n minum... konon jemur baju..yasmin bkn bg fic je hadiah bt me too!!!!!owh...so sweet...fic takut mak marah trus pakai heels yg baru dibeli....well overall today mmg best..fic!! nex time plis la bwk ur innova ok....nk tgk cara ko bawak keta....td rasa nk xcident sbb fic x abes2 buat bising...bt thank u la sayang tlg download benda dlm my laptop tadi....sempat la blajar skills fic dalam hal mcm nie...ok folks..nex time lau kteorg kuar kte org nk gather....lg ramai lg bagus.....b4 me,fic n yasmin masuk kolej....dadedu!!!!!

Nur Yasmin Ahmad Sapian

Darn it, i miss my OWN breakfast thread! I have fun with u guys and pls azim dont take my card speeches personally, we can always be more than tht in our part time. *wink wink* i've already cleared it with fic tht i love her more than i should. haha.

well, i had fic paying for my breakfast, should be like tht next time if she late again for 5 mins coz i wouldnt. hihi. i didnt tell fic tht i hate her for being sooooo thin( more to jealous?) but then again she's happy with her ways. so called mak datin she is. i bought those 2 a sundae cone wishing it was the first day of the month so i could buy them half price. very stingy yasmin! lalalala.

fic, i hope u keep my present well cuz we will be doing something while u innit and wer the HELL IS MY BIRTHDAY PRESENT?????? So i'll have my yaslut status. azim, i hope u like the my pressie to u. i wish i cud bring eva longoria to appear from inside the HUGE cake wearing lingerie or absolutely nothing for u but hey, u gonna get tht someday on ur own birthday bash with the all victoria secret models after the succesfull of ur fashion shows. i mean it!!! better send me an invitation too. then we all can get naked! hahahahaha.

it was a nice ride until SOMEONE keep complaining bout me wearing rear seat belt and she doesnt! screw u nose fic...i dont wanna die just yet! overall, it was fun since the last time i have fun, looking forward to do it again. maybe we should try dinner? oh, i can never forget tht we actually watching victoria secret shows in public. maybe next time we should do sex tape and i'll bring the stereo so everyone will be hearing those moaning n groaning.ok, tht's just gross!

P/s: never forget about our travel plans, fic n azim u can come too and our recent plan want to go to the zouk is still on.hey, we already 18 rite?

love from ur less gay than urselves sweetheart,

yasmin.

My good and bad.

GOOD:

1. Eclipse
2. Twilight
3. Edward and Bella
4. Dreams
5. Absent-minded
6. Thoughts
7. Scrapbook
8. Friends
9. Bronte sisters
10. Classic

BAD:

1. Teacher interview [sucks big time!]
2. Loss of someone I love
3. New moon publisher
4. Lost in a big mall
5. Spending too much
6. Alone
7. Sins
8. Fear of something you have never seen before
9. Too much stuff
10. Waiting for something good to come along.

It's randomly arranged. Nothing personal but that's just me. Bad weekends. I wish someone would die for me. I wish I wasn't afraid. I wish my obsessive-compulsive disorder doesn't crossed the line. So many wishes of discontentment. I wish I wasn't that either. :]

New in the family!

Well, actually I kidnapped them from someone I know and they let me have it? Haha. They are Kello and Mello. I took the pictures after their shower day. Smell nice and all clean. White and

fluffy. Its been a while that I'm petless since I've lost my little Blackookie. Gosh, I miss her. She was my bestfriend. So, what she's a cat? At least she doesn't stab me in the back or something, unlike you. Yeah, you. Anyway, this two cute guys (ehh, both of them are male ya?) is oh-so-cute and super active and extremely playful. I'm gonna miss them when I'm away soon to college. They are like my little children. Haha. I love them sooooooooo much! Muaxx! :]

Boys, guys, mens

Gosh, I really couldn't live a day without blogging! All the other days I've skipped, you don't want to know how miserable I am. LOL. Absurd. So, there is a good friend of mine, Aya, she asked me about when will I ever find a guy that I could call my own and can't wait to see I'm in someone else's arms, huh? Yeah, I know it would be a real fun to you. I mean, it does occur to me because you know, sometimes it does get really lonely but I just don't know. Maybe it's just me, waiting for something more or maybe it's the guys who thought I wasn't good enough? See, I don't really know but as far as I know, I'm pretty happy with myself. I don't mind going out alone although it's always better to have a friend to keep you company, so you don't have to look stupid with nobody.

Sometimes, the thoughts of having someone making you feel like...special or loved, ok, by a guy scares me. I know, I know its wasn't supposed to be that way but it's how I feel. Right now. I find it's hard to accept guys that even only asking for my phone number, I've become numb and shy away. No, I don't have any bad experience with any guys, in fact I'm pretty friendly with everyone. So, why? Well, my guess is I'm lack of experience with guys or either if a guy wants me, he needs to work hard twice, no triple and die-trying. Yeah, time. I need time. That's what I need. But that doesn't mean, if you talk to me, I won't be responding or anything. I'll talk to you and get to know you but if it comes down to that, the thing will be needed to be taken really slowly. I'm easily spooked. Also curious. And observant. Before anything else, I just want to know all about him, without freaking him out that is. That's me. :]

I love you and I'll miss you all the way until the time is through.

I've been away for so long now, maybe not. Probably because I've always update my blog daily. It's becoming kinda addictive but I personally love every minute I spent on it! LOL. So, I've been busy for a while. My nenek. She passed away on 7th May when she was warded at HKL 2 weeks ago on Friday. Guess who is free enough to accompany her at the hospital? Me! Well, I don't mind, I mean spending time with nenek is a loving moment but sometimes I just got scared thinking of the fact that I will be sleeping in a hospital, yes, its the weak heart of mine and if anything happens to nenek, yeah, I try so hard not to think of anything that leads to that.

It wasn't long that it was only me alone who can keep her accompanied. My mum has to rush in almost everyday because I called her to come almost everyday. Not because of me, but it's nenek. She wasn't stabilized even in the hospital. She has lung cancer, advanced by her first cancer, cervix cancer. She has a hard time to breathe, helping by oxygen supplied, she couldn't eat anything solid, only in liquid form like half-boiled eggs, milk and etc. She couldn't sleep without morphin and coughing non- stop. So, if you was there all the time, what would you feel, seeing your grandma suffering like that? I was FREAKIN SCARED! Let alone I can't do anything to help her ease her pain, to watch her like that? It's not a beautiful scenario.

I thought I could be with her at the hospital all through the week until she is discharge on last Sunday but she went away first on that Wednesday. All of her daughters except for her youngest that was having last sem. exams at her university in Sarawak was there by her death bed and me too. For a second, I could not believe that I've lost her. I mean, I was with her all the time to the very end. Now, I missed her, I missed touching her hands and feet making sure they are warm, not cold, feed her food, making her nestum plus milk and remind her about taking her med. But, now, she's not here anymore.

Sometimes, I blame myself because I've lost her. It was me who taking care of her at the end of her life. I felt that sometimes I was a bit pushy and not patience with her. But most of it, I blame the doctor. Yeah, you don't wanna know about that. Anyway, I hope nenek is rest in peace now and finally can be with atuk. I hope both of them will be among the people who is loved and forgiven by Allah.

Semoga Allah mencucuri roh mereka dan menempatkan mereka di kalangan orang-orang yang beriman dan beramal soleh. Al-FATIHAH. Amin.

Twiligt movie, books and series...I want more!

Oh how a big fan I am of the books! I still remember the first time I read the book, it was Twilight... it was indescribably amazing. I've read it hundreds of times and never ever get tired of it. Edward is a perfect imagination of a man and Bella is just so human with the right responses upon the right circumstances. Both are made for each other. Stephanie Meyer really have created a story that everyone are dying hard to be in. I would lie if I say 'not for me'. Everyone is talking about it and now a movie? It's going to be huge and it's just going to be enormously HUGE! But, would it disappointed the fans if the movie didn't worked out as planned? We'll see at the end of the year.

Edward. What more could a girl wants if you have Edward? He's got everything or not. But I would definitely go for the thrilling and all those dangerous moments. Despite that he is a vampire, supposedly to be strong, tough and ruthlessly cruel in killing humans, he is rather seems vulnerable, emotionally when it comes to Bella. I just love the way he being too cautious around her, try not to break her and so. He is a dream man and I bet nobody would resist him if he is exactly according to how Meyer describe it. I wouldn't mind having him, so what if he is a vampire? It's just going to make my days interesting and....yeah, like it would happen in real life. But minus the mind reading tho, you don't want to know what is in my mind and me too. So, being different like Bella is a definitely plus. And I think Edward loves Bella because she is a human and there's fresh red blood pumping warmth under her pale skin that attracts him the most. Maybe that's why he wants Bella to stay human because he sees her as a very beautiful human, so fragile and so different. It would change everything if Bella ever change. But then again, it would be hard for both of them. I can't wait for the outcome for the end of this stories by Meyer. Will she be changed or not. So, the movie, I was reluctant at first to accept this, like you would care hmm, because after this Edward would be Robert Pattinson. Ok, here's the thing, we all know Edward is extraordinary in every aspect of life but we never really knew how exactly he looks like and I'm pretty sure everyone has their own 'Edward' self in their head and me too. I have fun time thinking about it, recreate a face, figure and try to picture him as a real person in real life but now, Edward is Robert Pattinson. Ok, I wasn't against the movie, I think the movie it a great thing but it just got me thinking, Edward would be Robert Pattinson. Physically. How many times have I said it?

Bella. I really love Bella. I think she is a perfect human girl, a perfect teenage girl. What? I love her right responses to her environment. So human. She's rather clumsy but that's just seems normal to me. Sometimes it's hard to keep everything in control, like not to trip in front of boys and so, I guess Bella didn't have to work 'hard' to get boys. Yes, boy's'. In the end, she's got Edward without even trying. Maybe with her clumsiness, hey, it's works for her. Often being a target to danger, I guess Bella needs Edward and Edward needs Bella to soothe his loneliness after all the years. I have to say this again, I like Bella, it's how Meyer describes her, you know, she don't have to be the It girl or even a model look-alike. She's described as just a normal girl that comfortable wearing jeans and t-shirt, no need to be excessive, just that. I would say I wanna be like her, despite of everything. She is different in a lot of ways with a little sarcastic, she knows how to have her ways with Edward, often absent-minded, and probably can get away with anything. All she needs to be is brave, blushed as scarlet and bet on her life for her love ones. It's good and bad enough for Edward. LOL. But it seems the relationship is rather complicated( just the way I love it), like Bella would sacrifice anything for Edward even her life, how Edward still afraid that he can't control his hunger around Bella and insist if Bella wants to walk away and forget him, how other people revolve around them, the bad vampires and the differences among species, how she has to choose and how Bella wants to be one but Edward refuse? So many of them. Complication after complication. That's what makes them as a couple really interesting. And I really love the way Edward 'takes control' of Bella. In ways that is. Despite of being a good vampire, there's still a bit of predator needs left inside of him, makes him really desirable? Check out the meadow parts. My favorite. How I wish it was me. Heh. :]

Blog, blogger, blogging.

Today I've read something about blog, you know how it would become the next big media source and how blog would cause disaster among humans? Just by a word about someone or something, you going to get trouble if you 'touch' the sensitive parts.

I was a little offended by the report saying that blogs that contain useless information and created just for fun is just trash. I mean, for example like me, I joined this blog because I have so much to say about something, anything. From the littlest thing until the most powerful thing in the world, if I have a say for it, I want to write it down and save the text I've wrote. Because I would read those thoughts of mine again and thinking how lame it is and just have a laugh out of it. Yes, I always does that. So, I don't really care if people won't read my 'trash' because we have the right to choose. It's my blog and it's your judgement against your right and wrong. Or like or not. See through it. :]

Connection

Why the other families has to be such a fussy nuisance ? Not your own family, is it your aunt's family or your dad's cousin's and etc.? Well mine is my biggest pet peeve ever. Didn't they ever know or even heard about the word 'privacy'? Is it that hard not to follow us around every time, I mean every time? Anywhere we are, there's them. Sucks la. They don't think about anyone but their selves. It's not like we're in movie where the plot was undeniably complicated and pack with stupid drama. It could be a hell lot easier and we all could have a simpler life. What a drag.

I really hate it. But what I like the most is when mum take action. Ouch, it's so bad and somebody gonna get hurt big time. Or not because they were stupid enough to get it right away. Dumb ass. Hahahaha. I'm talking about someone who 'may' be related to me and I do feel good about it. After all they've done to my mum for all these years, those so called family members deserve a wake up call and God has shown them the way. What an ironic life. What goes around comes around, eh? Sooner or later. :]

The real thing

Mr. Razi is simply an amazing person and definitely a great teacher of the driving school that I went to have my driving lessons. He-who-is-name-shall-not-be-mention on the other hand was unexpectedly been a helpful in the process. I will never forget both of them for the kind of opposite personalities they've shown me. They let me see the real world. Anyone who is desprately need help on how to control a car, you can find Mr. Razi at Imkeda Au3. With him, anything is possible. You gotta trust me on this!

OMG. I just realize this. Turning 18 means I have to be responsible for my own self, my action and my life? Oh, that's almost sounds scary, to me. Yeah, I'm probably not ready for that. Now I can't say anything sarcastically insulting :P and get away with it. Haha. So much of being an adult trouble. Well, I'll try to keep surviving. In the mean time, let's see if I can like you like you like me or the other way around. :]

Unexpected

Everyone hate to admit defeated. Even me. So, let's fight to death.

Oh. I passed my drive test today. First attempt. It was freakishly hard but every minutes of it was worth it. The officer was kinda feisty, especially the women. Ooooh, you really can't mess up with them, not don't want, but can't. You'll see your life flash before your eyes and you can say goodbye to on getting a driving licence, at least for that day. There's always a second chance, hmm? But not for me. I've passed and I'm going to drive! Haha. What such a big deal I make out of it. I told you it wasn't easy and even I don't expect to pass both or pass anything at all. So many flaws and I almost lost my mind and out of breath to almost die. Literally. But I did it and I was proud of myself.

I've failed once, big time on the most important thing of my insignificant life. I broke my parent's heart and mine. The people were so cruel enough to make a fun out of me because of it. I guess it got me thinking. I make a promise to myself that I WILL NOT FAIL ANYTHING ELSE in my future. I'll make sure everything work according to plan. I know its going to be so hard but I'll try to get by. No, I'll get by. 'Fail' will not be in my life vocabulary anymore, well at least it stays on the tip of my lips. For the sake of myself and for my mum. Only god knows how much I love her. She is my everything. Everything I do, it was always her. Mummy's girl. I am and I don't care. I love her with all my heart. I don't think I could ever love anyone like I love her. Sorry boys. Mum comes first. :]

(My dad brought me a present today for my 18th birthday....suprise, suprise....hmm, its scary!)

Newborn

Hey, hey people. Lol. Like you would read this anyway, well I would. Lame. I know. Anyway, I'm kinda new and this is the first. So, here it goes....

So, yesterday was my birthday, my 18th birthday.But I don't feel happy. Don't we supposed to feel happy on the '18th birthday', the day when you are legal enough to do things that illegal to you for the past 17 years of misery? Ok, minus 5 years for a memorable and fun childhood. So, 12 years of misery. Afraid of getting old? I think for this range of age, maturity. No, it's not that. I dunno why, I don't feel like celebrating it and I supposed it's just me. Typical me. Making something out of nothing. Well, it sure feel better to let it all out. One question tho, can we actually blog our feelings? It got me thinking.... :]